One can still hope right?
Anyway, so today is Mother’s Day (in the United States that is!). Like Valentine’s Day, it’s just another one of those specific days that apply to a certain group of people. For me, it’s a mixed bag of emotions.
Flashback to the ’00s. Mother’s Day was such a busy day! Even though I was mom myself, the day was filled with traveling, visiting, transporting flowers, enjoying a BBQ, everyone laughing and enjoying their gifts and tear-inducing greeting cards. As with all things, times change. Jump forward to today and I’ve been through the loss of both my grandmother and my mother. It’s a club that most will be forced to join against their will, but once you’re in, there’s no getting out. Your perception of the day changed and refocuses.
While you will hear many say that every day is Mother’s Day, our society is what it is and this special day of attention can be a mixed bag of emotions for someone like me. I no longer visit the greeting card store, and as a widow, I don’t often receive things as my children aren’t clued in as much to getting me something and don’t have anyone to say, “Let’s go out and get your mom something!” as my husband did years ago. I don’t need “things” anyway to be perfectly honest. Sure, I love handmade cards and a fresh flower plucked from the yard, but I truly don’t desire materialistic things anymore. What I appreciate now are the small gestures, the true acts of endearment that show love and caring. I finally get it after all these years. Trying to come up with enough money to get flowers for two or three people and the cards…that’s not what it’s all about.
This morning, my son made me breakfast and cleaned up after. Now THAT’s a gift LOL. My teenage daughter brought me beautiful flowers from a bush outside that’s in full bloom, a perennial my mother planted years ago. Those things I will remember and enjoy long after the day. The emotions and creativity behind these offerings show me the true meaning of the day. It’s not about how much you spend or where you got the item from…I get it now. Just having my children with me, especially all of them at once brings me far greater joy on special days (any day is fine with me though!)
I don’t want to give the impression that I don’t appreciate things bought for me. I think that anything given in the spirit of the moment is wonderful. I’ve enjoyed many things in the past, from jewelry, clothing, gift cards to my favorite places to eat and I’ve loved them all. I’m just melancholy and reflective on a day when there are no calls for ME to make. I’m not alone as I now have several friends who have lost their mothers and grandmothers and make the best of the day with fond remembrances and traveling down memory lane.
No matter how you spend your Mother’s Day, in the company of children, out and about visiting other moms in your life, being pampered in a salon, reflecting upon the loss of an angel baby or even visiting your loved ones’ final resting places, this day is for celebrating all the things you (we) do as moms.
Whether your baby is still growing inside you or has already sprouted their wings and is taking the world by storm, there is something amazing about creating life and nurturing it, tending it and setting it free. May we all be worthy of the awesome responsibility we’ve been given, for however long that may be. Happy Mother’s Day.