When you experience a major life change, whether it be a new job, the end of a relationship or marriage, a new baby or moving to a new home, change can be so overwhelming and daunting. We often don’t realize the toll it can take on us physically, emotionally and even spiritually (I believe that one doesn’t have to be religious to be spiritual, so this can mean many things!).
Having a support system is so important and reaching out for people to talk to or bounce ideas off of is paramount to getting through it. It’s been nearly two months since I’ve had even the desire to post anything and just my being here and typing is rather cathartic and refreshing, even though I just went through a major life change.
It was by far the best decision I’ve made in quite a long time. To be fair, I won’t go into specifics, but it was a situation that, no matter how much effort and time I put into it, I wasn’t getting anything in return. Zilch. So, in the interest of my family and my well-being, I made the change. I am renewed, happy and feeling much better about the future and my life. I guess I made the right decision.
I’d like to think that starting over again isn’t as bad as some people make it out to be. However, each time you turn the page, shred a chapter or or burn the whole book to ashes, there is a strong reason behind it. It can become very easy to dwell on the past and think of all the things that went wrong and how it could have been different, but it won’t change what happened. In my case, I haven’t done a lot of looking back, but I’ve forged ahead with reconnecting with those important to me and opening my eyes to new possibilities and hope for the future.
For me, it’s less of “reinventing myself” and more of forging ahead. The saying above annoyed me at first, with its judgy “you get another chance to make things right”, making me at first feel like I made terrible choices for myself and my family and wound up bitter, miserable and the most unhappy I’d been in ages. It was easy to see the negative in that phrase. Then, I sat back and thought about it and if you try to look for the positive; it’s in there. It’s about making things right for YOU and in my case, for ME. I kept getting stuck on “right” like it meant correct. No! It’s more about what’s the correct path for me, the destined path.
Take the time to look at the choices you made and learn from them. Don’t spend too much time dwelling on misery or hopelessness. I realize not everyone can do this and I’m not referring to those dealing with depression or other issues that can require professional assistance or more intervention. For me, it’s about waking up in the morning and saying to myself, “Today is what I make of it, not trying to make something of someone else”. My hope for tomorrow is about all the ways that my life can improve and be joyful and rewarding.
I’ve been fortunate to reconnect with friends and I’ve moved passed the past as it were. I feel lucky that I’ve been given a fresh start and enjoy looking at that blank page, fresh and ready to be filled with all the new experiences and next adventures in my life.